Author Lorelei Bell, welcomes you! Vampires are my addiction, I assume they are yours as well. Come and journey with me to the darker shadows, where the vampires lurk, watching us, waiting for us weak humans...

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Thursday, February 24, 2011


Hey I think this blog is long over-due for something like a rant day! I mean one day at least! Possibly Rant Day will become a few days. Hmm.

So please feel free to stop by and give me a rant.  Misery loves company remember and I think venting and ranting help a person to feel better!

I'll tell you what I've always done when I've had a particularly horrible day, I've always put on a horror film. Generally Psycho is great!  Also American Psycho and any of the Hannibal Lecter films.

I mean who doesn't love this:

Why this, on the right sort of day absolutely warms the cockels of my heart!

Okay so what's the rant I hear you ask.

Today's rant is about nuisance callers. When husband and I moved into our home in 2006 we were given a telephone number that was supposed to have been unused for a long time. Almost immediately we began getting calls asking for a certain party. I checked around and no one knew who this person was. The former owners had an entirely different phone number.

When I explained (and husband did too) that Mrs. Jack the Ripper or whatever the hell her name was was not us, THEY DIDN'T BELIEVE US!

"We've just moved in." We said.

Guess what? They phoned back, always with the same question: "May I speak with Mrs. Jack the Ripper, please."


THEY ARE STILL PHONING!  They sometimes let a few months go by and they phone again!

We've had this gizmo that stops unidentified calls from getting through but guess what?

Stepson laughed (with compassion it has to be said) and told us if they want to get through they'll get through whatever we do.

It's stopped for now, but I know it'll start up again. I always go into a bunker mentality wherein husband comes home and I greet him in a firing position with dogs cowering behind the sofa.
"Oh they called again!"


(Takes a breath) MY RANT FOR THE WEEK!
thank you!


Joann Hamann-Buchanan said...

LMAO!!!Ok, I know how annoying telemarketers can be, I was I know how crazed bill collectors can be...didn't do that one...but I was on the receiving end a long tme ago...not too fun. Still, there is a database companies purchase to make these calls. If the number tou have is in that database, there is not a way to change it unless you change your number. Sorry this is going on, just take comfort in knowing you can always mess with them...he he he . I have a few things that happened to me when i was telemarketing. For example. You can always put the phone down and let them go on and on and on. If it's a bill collector. Make up a story like Bubba died or tell them the cat is stuck in a tree and the fire department is onn the way and the roof is caving in and when they find so and so, let you

Anonymous said...

That's great!
Yeah this is over money and they aren't letting go.
One guy is obsessed he's the latest caller. He's called everyday for a few weeks.
I turned the phone off and used my cell phone! Made my husband call me on that!
but he's stopped now.

Yeah I'd love to do something horrible. the mind boggles.

I could say that the person he wants has been extradited to America. Apparently she got a hold of some weapons and shot up a collection agency...!

If they call again, I mean when they call again I won't say anything because it steams me up too muuch, i'll just disconnect the phone for a few hours type thing!


Next weeks' rant will be evil dentists!
heh heh heh!

I love the cat up the tree by the way.
'oh pardon me, but the cat is caught in the tree/dishwasher/ or 'Do forgive me but the house is on fire at the moment...'

you're great! thanks!

RL.Treadway said...

I found your blog spot from Indie Horror :-) I've had calls like this before. A female asking for "Dwayne". I know she thought I was lying when she repetitively called. At least in my case, with caller ID - I called her back one day out of the blue and started preaching to her about being in a relationship like that isn't healthy and she should dump the jerk. In mid-preaching she called me a bitch and hung up. Never heard from her again. :D
This tactic works for similar situations as your rant describes. When the object of your rant calls you - if male, start asking personal questions. Very personal. Such as what type of sexual positions he is fond of, and measurements, and his credit card #.
Ask if s/he's cute because you and your husband were thinking about a threesome and you have a blood fetish.
Or try to hook him (or her) up with a non-existent single son or daughter going through a bi-sexual phase and make them sound as horrible as possible THEN play the "Mother Martyr" role. NOBDOY wants to hear their parents bitch and moan about how they "Went wrong" with their kid ;-) I don't even have kids, but who are they to know what my age is? I've had telemarketer's and assorted prank callers hang up on me and never call back.
This is the one where four different telemarketer's hung up on me. I talked really, really fast and cussed a lot, I threw in some "god-dm mother effer gets on my nerves! You know what I effin mean? Can you relate to this s**t man? This biatch has her nerve to ** invent your angst here*
This is really upsetting me! You got a minute? I can't afford a therapist and my parents are biased."
Then don't give them the minute.
They try to deliver their pitch while you're yakking away, but it takes about twenty seconds before they get irked and hang up. Most of the calls are recorded and a supervisor always lurks nearby so they can't afford to sit there and listen to you disregard their sales pitch.

Anonymous said...

If I could give you an award, a kind of Oscars for the totally best approach with regard to handling annoying callers, I would give it to you!
That is the most amazing advice (I LOVE it) that I have ever heard.
Fabulous, it's hysterical!
But you see R.L., this idiot is probably from a collection agency. She owes money--so please put on your thinking cap and let's see if we can't come up with a devastating verbal assault that will effectively nuke this repulsive caller!
sincere thanks again!

RL.Treadway said...

Thank you :-) well, the idea may not be legal. The notion was to tell the persistent fellow that the person they are referring to is not a relative, but you heard they passed away. This forces them to go deeper in trying to find out who/where they are instead of using your telephone line.
Failing that, this is legal, at least in the U.S. Tell them every time they call they will be recorded and you're going to forward their name/number to law enforcement and file charges for harassment. If your country has a version of the national do not call registry - tell them you are signed up for that. Legally they cannot call you anymore.
IF you want to have a little fun with it though, get kinky with the guy! :p

Anonymous said...

I like kinky! Really make him squirm.
Laws have more teeth in them in the U.S. I'm originally from New York. it's different. There is a great deal of 'regulation', but when you get to the black and white issue of 'is it actually illegal?' you find out it isn't.

I've threatened him with all sorts of legal sounding things I thought sounded scary!

My stepson offered to deal with him on the phone but the thing was I didn't want this party to think I in any way knew anything about this woman he asks for, you know?

I'm going to just take the offensive and be as thoroughly offensive and torturous as i can be.

I might even enjoy it!

thanks so much, you really gave me some good suggestions.

Update: a kitchen place called three times in the past two days!

Our 'crime' was to change our minds and not buy a kitchen, they've never even been here or anything! it was purely a telephone enquiry that my husband made!

unreal, right?

RL.Treadway said...

you know...why not turn the tables and cold sell them your books???? I sure as hell would.

Anonymous said...

Great idea, but there's no way i want this main one to know my name.
I could see doing it if they already know my name!